Aubrey had planned on having a homebirth ever since she rotated on a labor and delivery unit as a medical student, she just knew it was not the setting where she would feel safe – and where her cervix would relax! – to give birth. She had some painful seasons waiting to get through medical school, intern year, two back surgeries, three years of residency, and her now-husband’s PhD before they had the ability to welcome a baby. She was ecstatic and in disbelief when they got pregnant on their first try. She was in disbelief a lot throughout her pregnancy and birth, which taught her a lot about the expectations and assumptions she was carrying without realizing it. She thought women in her family didn’t get morning sickness: she had all-day-sickness for 15 weeks straight. She thought she *knew* she was having a boy: nope, girl. She would never have dreamt that the COVID-19 pandemic could last her whole second trimester, let alone still be going on. She thought there would be at least – at least! – a week overdue – she was so sure of this in fact that when Seattle courthouses opened up for weddings when she was 38 weeks pregnant she scheduled their long-delayed wedding for 38 weeks and 6 days…and her amniotic sac tore as they were waiting for the judge!
What followed was a marathon and then a sprint of a labor that spanned from that Friday to the following Monday when she and her husband decided to take the plunge and take castor oil. She went from eating the castor oil at noon to jumping out of bed at 2pm in the heat of transition. She realized in retrospect she had never seen a woman in an unmedicated birth, let alone in transition in her home where she could really express the pain and raw fear she was experiencing. She dissociated for a time and within two hours felt the urge to push. Her midwives made it to the house by 4pm, declared her ready to push, and she delivered her daughter’s head herself in a birth tub in their living room with all the doors and windows open just shy of 6pm.
Aubrey Demajh Bio
Aubrey is first a wife to Brian and mama to their daughter Reverie. They live in Seattle with their two pups and enjoy hiking, skiing, and all laying in a big pile on the couch together. She is also a psychiatry resident, set to graduate in a few months with plans to launch her maternal psychiatry practice offering both therapy and medication support to mamas at all stages from preconception to deep in the trenches. She is committed to bridging the gaps that make it so difficult for mothers, especially in the precious first year postpartum, to access the therapy and psychological support they deserve in order to process and navigate the incredible and immense shift of bringing a child into the world. Her practice, The Postpartum Psychiatrist, will offer video-based therapy and medication support from the comfort of mothers’ homes. You can follow her @thepostpartumpsychiatrist or on her personal page @thedoctoraubz or email her at aubreydemajhmd@gmail.com.
Resources
- Foundation training
- Gokhale method
- Chiropractor who specializes in the Webster technique (For those in Seattle, recommend Tree of Life Chiropractic
- Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle
- Real Food for Pregnancy
- (If in Seattle, I highly recommend Meg Heather Ford for a doula: https://www.megheatherford.com/
- Happy Baby stretchy baby wrap
- Owlet oxygen monitor sock
Wumblekin
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